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Our 1st meeting was on 22/8/08...at Aza's house...we all wanted to make sushi at there...we bring the ingredients and such....Sasa also bring some other ingredients to cook the noodle....We arrived there...Sasa and me....cause he follow my car...we went upstairs....and saw an "AH MU"....then i turned out to be Baba...haha..it's dark...so can't see properly...that's so humorous...then Aza said need go through the back door...we go there....still need to wait...haih haih...slow slow...then finally...we entered the house...most comfortable is Aza's room...haha...air-conditioned room...Sasa cook noodle for us 1st....it's very delicious....haha...then later we went to buy some drinks...after that we rest awhile...then it's sushi making....we make some and eat some....then we make....make...and make...we're all full already...from eating the sushi as we make it....then we have a drink..." CHEERS to noobie family 1st meeting "....Hahaha...then take some pictures...haha....
It was 25 of August 2008...this day is very special to me...i went out with my da jie and sha po jie and some of their friends and some of them are my friends...Both of my jie jie wait me at boulevard KFC there...we already said to wait at there....i arrived and we walk to Michael Steamboat...we're the 1st one there...so we eat 1st...awhile later...more of their friends come...the food is very delicious...haha...my first time go there...it was about 9pm++ when we finished eating...later...i go with my da jie and sha po jie...to Canada Hill....our friend drive us there...this is also my 1st time go to Canada Hill at night time....we arrived there...the view of the city from there is just magnificient...the lights of the buildings the ships...the cold humid air..the dark starry sky...it's so wonderful to watch that lovely view with da jie and sha po jie....it's also very quiet and peaceful...i will never forget that night...haha...we take some photo together with everyone including me and my jiejies...and i got 2 hugs from sha po jie....that time i told her not to forget didi o...after awhile enjoying there...we have to go home already....it was almost 11pm...so late already...haha...i lean on da jie's shoulder in the car...warm warm shoulder...haha...almost fall asleep...hahaha....then i ask for a hug from her....she hugged me...i told her not to forget didi also...she say she wont de la...then i continue to lean on her shoulder...then reach their home...and it's time to say goodbye....wuwuwwuu....so sad...separation with my da jie and sha po jie....Now, sha po jie is working at KL...she says she's okay....i'm glad to hear that...and hope to hear from her soon....and da jie is working here in Miri....it's also very hard to contact her...she work early in the morning till late at night...she will be exhausted when her work finished...I feel somehow lonely and sad...but i have a noobie family to comfort me...hahaha...AND MY Da Jie and Sha Po Jie are IRREPLACEABLE...my feelings for them is very DEEP...~~~Missing my precious Da Jie and Sha Po Jie as always...even now~~~
Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any form of meaningful human contact. Lonely people often experience a subjective sense of inner emptiness or hollowness, with feelings of separation or isolation from the world.To me, loneliness is one of my most hated feelings...when i was in primary school...i was usually lonely...and i'm quiet...so i'm hard to befriends with....but i do have some good friends...one of them is my best friend, Chai Han Kiong...when he was in primary 6...his family had to move to bintulu...so...he left Miri...i lost contact with him after i went into secondary school...he gave me his handphone number but i lost it....i still remember him until now...hahahaha...and after that time...i only have some chinese friends...there are some iban and malay friends...but they don't treat me very nice...sometimes they like...alienated me...completely ignoring me for a whole day...make fun of my name...and such...so i'm lonely at that time...hoping my best friend would come back. And in secondary school...when i was form 1...the iban and malay friends still have a habit of bullying me...sometimes they would steal my drinking bottle...still make fun of me..and other more horrible things...But everything change when i was in form 2...there's my new best friend....his name is Aaron Wong Vun Heng...we both really like to draw...and we usually go everywhere together...both of our results are not so good though...but we really had good times together...he transfered into RRSS after he finished form 2...Oh ya...he also repeated a year in form 3 to take his PMR...We still have contact each other until now...we usually go shopping together...haha...for clothes...accessories...and such...we talk about girls and such...haha...Other than that, there's my da jie and sha po jie...last year...we had so much fun together...hahaha...i would usually go hit their head lightly...and they would hit back...haha...they are very close to me...and i don't have a real jie jie...so...they are really important to me...and i love them very much...haha...they graduated from St.co last year...now they are working and studying....But i still not sure where they are going though...i will always remember them...Now, it's just me and some good friends...sometimes...they would do homework together...but you know...i'm not good in studies...just good at drawing...so..normally..i ended up alone...drawing silently on my desk...waiting for someone to talk to me and accompany me...sometimes i will show my drawings to my friends...they would comment my drawing...but i can't really take criticism...but i will try to do better...hahaha....sometimes i feel i don't belong here...hope that someone will understand me better...i just don't want to be alone....KerO~
Haha...finally confirmed liao....my feelings i mean....
u know...my feelings always not clear...but some are CLEAR...haha....
i just admire the girl...nothing more than that....hahaha...
but the dream had made me realized that i admired her...
hahaha....>.< KErO~
Hmm....I'm also not so sure with my own feelings....maybe the " dream" is what i actually feel...but...i'm most definitely confused....the dream made me realized my feelings towards her...i don't know what to do now...the feeling is increasing...every second...every moment....everytime....but i love this feeling...i feel happy....it's been so long since i was happy....happy...a very wonderful feeling....my feelings for her is still not clear...so i need time to give me the answer...so..i'll be waiting...even if this is my true feelings...i won't let her know it...maybe i will just secretly like her....i don't want to disturb her...'cause i feel that she already have someone in mind...and it's not me...it's my friend...sometimes i feel very sad and jealous...looking at her with my friend....taking photos...chatting with him...and so on...this is a bitterweet feeling of mine...but nevermind...at least i have someone in my heart now...the feelings to be in love....so love it..YEAH!!...
I had a dream...i dreamt of a girl...my friend actually...but not so close...In my dream...i ask her...I said, "Do you like me?"...then she said "en" then laugh a bit...then i said," Really?"...then laugh a bit again....we are very close that time...i mean in my dream...hahaha...then i woke up liao....i don't know why i dream of her...normally...i don't have that kind of dreams....love dreams....it feels so real this time....and i'm a bit happy...hahaha...don't know why...and now...i'm a bit interested in her....and i wan to be with her...but i don't think i CAN be with her though...haha...i know that this is only a dream...but...the feeling is increasing everytime....i'm so confused....my dream heart?! maybe i just think too much....hahaha...nevermind...at least it made me feel a bit happy....i don't know how to face her...and i also can't take my eyes off her...AND i wont MENTION who is the GIRL....haha
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